Does
God Care If I Eat Chocolate Ice Cream (Part 2)
Picture
yourself sloughing through the line in your dining hall at school (work, camp,
wherever, use your imagination). All afternoon, you’ve wanted chocolate ice
cream. Your overwhelming desire for a chocolate treat is stymied when as you
arrive the last scoop is scraped from the bottom of the container. The people
behind the counter promise more in the very near future. And your hankering
will not be ignored. So you wait. And as you wait you strike up a conversation.
Your conversation reveals a similar destination after dinner, (a guest speaking
at a lecture, perhaps?) to which you walk together. You’re introduced by your
ice cream buddy to a group of people, one of whom shares your field of study.
You share classes. Over the course of your time together, you grow to love one
another. You’re off onto an adventure to happily ever after.
So,
if you hadn’t stuck around for the ice cream, you’d have missed the person, who
introduced you to the classmate, who brought you love. How does this penchant
for ice cream fit into God’s grand design? And if it doesn’t, were we really
supposed to meet?
O.K.
So the hypotheticals are always fun but let’s run down a real live scenario.
2001-
I write my first entirely voluntary short narrative for a writing contest, a
surrealist piece where people can battle with music.
2002-
A spritely 60 something substitute teacher in my AP American History class,
flails about, coffee in hand, going on about the nature of history as fact and
story. Almost frightening in his enthusiasm for learning I learned more that
day than in the rest of the class. And despite seeing him from a distance
across hallways and through classroom doors, throughout my entire time in high
school we never speak again.
2003-
My friend’s mom mentions a new coffee shop in downtown Canton. Muggswigz proves
to have the finest tea selection I’ve ever laid eyes on. It’s beautiful. And I
evangelize the daylights out of the place. I drag every willing person there;
and even the odd unwilling person. Regular game nights, meetings, pretty much
everything could be held there.
2005-
I apply for a job in the banquets department of the Marriott McKinley Grand
Hotel, setting up and tearing down rooms for events. After a quick chat with
the woman behind the desk, I ask to whom, “Attn:” should be given. “Well, I’m actually
the manager of the front office. I could use a personality like yours.” And
just like that, I’m a bellman.
The
Marriott McKinley Grand Hotel provides the background for the most absurd
roller coaster of sexual identification and misidentification in my entire
life. A stack of funny stories start to pile up and I become a hit at parties,
“the almost but not really gay man.”
2008-
Living with another guy in a tent, to teaching dance, to being stalked for
weeks, my stories begin overflowing my memories. I start writing down my
adventures.
2009-
The pile of notes, stories and ideas is not close to being a book. I start a
blog to get a sense of accomplishment.
August
2011- After something of a slow spell, I read the incredible 33 Million People in the Room by
Juliette Powell, and redouble my blogging efforts and focus.
October
2011- My blog revived I read, Everything YouNeed to Know About Blogging, the author’s idea of writing books for digital
publishing in a effort to get attention to your sites, resonates with me, I
start dusting off ancient notebooks and getting my book back in order.
November 1st, 2011- Three days
after reading the book, sitting in Muggswigz working on my writing, I see my
quirky sub from history class, looking as spry as ever, and wonder if he’s
still scaring the little highschoolers. That’s not what I said though. I asked
him if he was still overwhelming the minds of the future. He laughed, and he
told me that he was not. And though he didn’t remember me, he then asked me
what may be the most off the wall question of my month (or more), “So, do you
have anything that you’ve written that you’re looking to get published?”
WHAT?!?
Who asks that? That’s the kind of timing reserved for the movies. Not even good
movies, Deus ex machina, B movies, pull this kind of craziness. I stammered and
stuttered,
“Actually,
I’m working on a book right now.” Why
would he open such an odd line of inquiry? Oliver substitute is now OliverHouse Publishing. Back at his table, he proceeds to introduce me to his
business partner, who loves my idea and excitedly. I receive an enthusiastic
invitation to an event which the publishing house is having. After which, “if
you like what you see. We can work out some details.”
Even
if I don’t sign a huge book deal and become the next ______ (insert your
favorite widely published, yet poignant and challenging author here), this was
a very life affirming event. So, here goes.
I
know that there is no way that I would have been able to engineer even half of
those things in such a way as to achieve this result. I believe, and even like
the idea, that God leant divine influence to the proceedings. And I am wildly
appreciative. But where does the “will
of God” start? Was it a part of the plan that I went to Muggswigz, that hour?
If I hadn’t said hi to Mr. Oliver would I have been in defiance to God? What
about reading those books? Or having fun living the almost gay life? Or
blogging? Or moving to DC? Or teaching dance? Or living in a tent? Or working
at a hotel? Or being chatty with the person behind the counter? Or trying out
the new place in downtown Canton? Or entering a story contest? And there’s no
way I made myself have Mr. Oliver only once as a sub, in my three years.
So
if I’m not acting to deliberately do these things, and God just seems to
move them about, where do I actually fit in?
