Wednesday, November 11, 2009

On a Day Like This One

I've decided that one of the top de-humanizing experiences is that of having a table at a crowded coffee shop.
It's pretty incredible. When you have the brilliant good fortune of beating the rush, or just the mule-like determination to wait out the next free seat, every Johnnie-come-lately suddenly starts giving you the stink eye. People who were smiling at you on the street are looking at you like you just exported their job to china. It's sick.

Then, the coup de grace, weakness is shown. You polish off you drink, close your book, and stretch. As if by magic, 6 people are standing within two feet of you. The boldest of them narrowly misses stepping on your foot. They think of you as nothing more than a free willed seat warmer. Some go as far as to begin unpacking before the soon to be former occupant has even vacated "Are you going to be getting up."

More of a statement than a question, this is usually the point where I start thinking of things to do to keep me in that seat as long as possible. "Yes, I've taken out a lease on the spot and won't be leaving 'til late spring. "